EPISODE 040 – Resilience Requires Rest


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In today’s episode Komal shares: 

  • Her thoughts on the importance of creating rest in our lives to build up our resilience
  • Three areas that we can focus our attention to build our resiliency
  • Deep and profound questions to dive in and ask yourself while you are working on building your resiliency
  • And so much more

Komal will have your minds working today as she reminds you that to be able to show up in the world as your very best self, you must first take the right steps to be rested.  

Would you like to connect with Komal?  You can find her on Facebook and Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/komalminhas https://www.facebook.com/komalminhas/

or online at https://komal.com.

Hit the play button above or keep scrolling for the full transcription!

Resilience requires rest. The times in my life when I was most vulnerable, most fragile, most ready to break, were the times in my life when I had not taken care of myself well, and consistently were the times in my life when I hadn’t leaned on my community, or the times in my life when I wasn’t grounded in my own identity and what I wanted to do in the world. So I want this to be your reminder to take care of yourself, to refuel yourself, to refill your cup, because that is the only way for you to sustainably show up for those you love and for your work in this world. So when it comes to our resiliency, there are a few ways for us to build up resilience. Three areas of focus that I’m going to share with you today are a focus on community, a focus on identity and the impact we want to make, and a focus on our wellness. 

First, let’s talk about community. Where would we be in life if it weren’t for the ones we love? And if it weren’t for being supported by people we care about? Where would we be if we weren’t able to help others? It nourishes me when I can take care of the people around me in small and big ways. So ask yourself, How can I better care for the people around me right now? How can I pay more attention to what they might need? How can supporting them help me feel well? If that feels like too much, then let’s turn the lens towards ourselves. What do you most need right now? What needs your time and attention? How can you ask others for that support? Asking for help is a really difficult thing to do especially sometimes we aren’t even able to identify what it is that requires assistance in our lives. So much is going on and we are keeping so many balls in the air that it feels impossible to know how am we are supposed to reach out to someone, delegate this, I’ll just do it myself. But especially in these extraordinary times, we have to flex that muscle of asking others for support, asking others to help us through these hard times. And often, although folks might not be able to support you in a physical sense right now, they for sure can in an emotional way. If you just need a good cry with someone you love, if you just need some time on FaceTime, shooting back and forth and just catching up on old times. If you just need to see some young kids to bring you joy on the other side of the screen if you don’t have kids at home.  Ask for what you need, ask for the connection you are looking for. It will fill your cup, you might feel fatigued from zoom and FaceTime and all these things right now in this period of life. But don’t withhold from yourself. The ability to connect to those we love. Because family time and connecting with those we love online is not the same as showing up for a work meeting. And don’t let your mind get confused between the two. When we lean on our community, it can change the quality of our days and our lives. 

Well being research shows us across the board that any key factor to being resilient to increasing your well being in your everyday life, to feeling well, is connection to others in a community of support. So a question I’ll leave you with as you reflect on this part of your life is how can you activate your community around your needs right now? Who can you ask for help? Who do you need to call? Reflect and journal on this and then do the outreach. Build habits around consistently connecting with the people you care about. 

Another way to build your resiliency and refill your cup. Another way to cultivate some rest in your mind and your life right now is by reflecting on your identity, who you are, what makes you who you are and by considering the impact you want to leave on your family, & on this world. Self reflection is such a powerful tool to help us reconnect to our why, to who we are and to why we are. It provides deep rest for me because the closer aligned I am to my bottom line values, my dreams, my goals in this world the more connected I am to my heritage, my ancestry, my faith, my roots, my language, my culture, and the more stable and secure and grounded I feel on a daily basis. So I encourage you to ask yourself what do I love most about my identity? What serves me most every day when it comes to who I am? What values are most important to me when I show up every single day? And what is the kind of legacy I want to leave on this world, on my family, on my community? These can feel like really big questions. But sometimes when we zoom out and think of the macro parts of our lives, it can give us the perspective we need to get through small difficult moments. And it can help us reconnect to that why. To that reason we are here. And that helps me rest. That helps me take a step back, take a deep breath in and to remind myself, that life is long and that we have a lot of time to make happen, all the things that we want to make happen, but that along the way, we can root even more deeply into our identity and the legacy we want to leave behind. 

Now finally, the third aspect of building your resiliency, the most critical one when it comes to resting, to make sure we are resilient, is focusing on your wellness. What have you done for you today? For your body, for your mind, for your spirit? How have you tangibly refilled your cup today? Have you drank enough water? Have you moved your body in the ways that you can? Have you taken some moments for mindfulness or meditation to just give yourself a break? You’re here listening to this show. I’m proud of you. Taking some time to be with yourself. I’m proud of you. Wellness is a key pillar of resilience. Because as I said when we started today’s episode, if you are fragile, overextended, it makes you more vulnerable. It makes rising more difficult. It makes falling apart and cracking and breaking down more likely. If you can create and cultivate small habits every single day that can support your overall wellness and well being you are going to be so much better set to sustain over the long term. This can look like morning walks. This can look like a few deep breaths as soon as you wake up. This can look like a cup of tea just before bed. This can look like small and powerful rituals for yourself that you do consistently to feel well. One tool that I’ll offer you for your wellness toolkit is to make a list of activities that make you feel good in mind, body spirit, and keep that list by your bedside or in a note on your phone. And cultivating one time every day, when you will choose one activity from that list to do just for you for five minutes, maybe 10. Just focus on showing up for yourself at that time every day. Looking at your list and picking the one thing you’re going to do for yourself. Because you deserve to feel well. You deserve to have a full cup. And you deserve to be as resilient as possible. 

So as you look to resting to build your resilience, consider how your community can support you. Consider how reflecting on your impact you want to have on this world and your identity, how that might help you feel well. And then think about your wellness and how you’re showing up for your body, mind and spirit right now. So that you can really refill your cup and start feeling even better every day. Because we are resilient. Look at all you’ve survived. Look at all you’ve overcome. Look at everything that you are. Take some time to journal on these three different things and make a small strategy for yourself and a plan for yourself to make more space for you in your everyday life. 

I’m gonna leave you with a few questions I want you to consider what you have overcome in the last few months that you are proud of? What you have survived and what you would like for these next few months ahead? How can you show up for a rest in your life in these three months that are coming up? 

I hope that you enjoyed diving into these questions about resilience with me. And I look forward to the rest you’re going to cultivate for yourself as you move forward in your life.

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In gratitude,

The Great Canadian Woman inc.™ Team

Komal Minhas

Komal Minhas

Komal Minhas is an internationally respected Canadian resilience educator, host, interviewer, investor and champion of women and women’s rights. Featured on Oprah’s Super Soul 100 list, Komal has interviewed inspiring people including Michelle Obama and Sophie Gregoire Trudeau, is the founder and host of the successful podcast Lessons Learned featuring soulful conversations about resilience as well as the host of StartUp Canada’s THRIVE Podcast for women entrepreneurs. She has also produced the documentary film Dream, Girl that premiered in 2016 at the White House during the Obama presidency, and survived a cancer diagnosis and a neurological illness at age 26 that same year.

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